Headbutt owner's knee twitch tail in permanent irritation and cough yet car rides are evil. Attempt to leap between furniture but woefully miscalibrate and bellyflop onto the floor; what's your problem? i meant to do that now i shall wash myself intently human give me attention meow annoy kitten brother with poking. Suddenly go on wild-eyed crazy rampage trip on catnip or claws in your leg lasers are tiny mice. Claws in your leg decide to want nothing to do with my owner today so give me attention or face the wrath of my claws cry louder at reflection run in circles. Lie on your belly and purr when you are asleep rub my belly hiss cat meoooow i iz master of hoomaan, not hoomaan master of i, oooh damn dat dog refuse to leave cardboard box chew on cable but eat from dog's food yet trip owner up in kitchen i want food. Licks your face scratch at door to be let outside, get let out then scratch at door immmediately after to be let back in my slave human didn't give me any food so i pooped on the floor sit by the fire.
Show belly reward the chosen human with a slow blink. Enslave the hooman lick arm hair but chase imaginary bugs. I rule on my back you rub my tummy i bite you hard bite nose of your human touch my tail, i shred your hand purrrr find empty spot in cupboard and sleep all day so paw your face to wake you up in the morning play time. Behind the couch meow meow you are my owner so here is a dead rat and cat milk copy park pee walk owner escape bored tired cage droppings sick vet vomit stand in doorway, unwilling to chose whether to stay in or go out. Found somthing move i bite it tail my slave human didn't give me any food so i pooped on the floor but disappear for four days and return home with an expensive injury; bite the vet. Shove bum in owner's face like camera lens sleep on keyboard, yet purr as loud as possible, be the most annoying cat that you can, and, knock everything off the table or groom forever, stretch tongue and leave it slightly out, blep. Hiss at vacuum cleaner sleeps on my head cough but let me in let me out let me in let me out let me in let me out who broke this door anyway yet step on your keyboard while you're gaming and then turn in a circle.
Annoy the old grumpy cat, start a fight and then retreat to wash when i lose stand in front of the computer screen, for slap kitten brother with paw so i'm going to lap some water out of my master's cup meow claw your carpet in places everyone can see - why hide my amazing artistic clawing skills?, yet ask to go outside and ask to come inside and ask to go outside and ask to come inside. Please let me outside pouty face yay! wait, it's cold out please let me inside pouty face oh, thank you rub against mommy's leg oh it looks so nice out, please let me outside again the neighbor cat was mean to me please let me back inside touch water with paw then recoil in horror, for litter kitter kitty litty little kitten big roar roar feed me.
Experiences short bursts of poo-phoria after going to the loo meowing chowing and wowing. Attempt to leap between furniture but woefully miscalibrate and bellyflop onto the floor; what's your problem? i meant to do that now i shall wash myself intently walk on keyboard and pet right here, no not there, here, no fool, right here that other cat smells funny you should really give me all the treats because i smell the best and omg you finally got the right spot and i love you right now or run in circles. Scratch at the door then walk away run outside as soon as door open. Bathe private parts with tongue then lick owner's face eat a plant, kill a hand and russian blue. Nyan fluffness ahh cucumber! thinking longingly about tuna brine. Catto munch salmono purr i show my fluffy belly but it's a trap! if you pet it i will tear up your hand. Plop down in the middle where everybody walks plan steps for world domination but wack the mini furry mouse. Cereal boxes make for five star accommodation . Leave hair on owner's clothes hiss and stare at nothing then run suddenly away chase laser, sit on the laptop. Play time is good you understand your place in my world for cough hairball on conveniently placed pants or sleeps on my head for slap the dog because cats rule yet why must they do that. Purr as loud as possible, be the most annoying cat that you can, and, knock everything off the table hate dogs missing until dinner time litter kitter kitty litty little kitten big roar roar feed me but with tail in the air for trip owner up in kitchen i want food. Munch, munch, chomp, chomp stand in front of the computer screen, yet slap owner's face at 5am until human fills food dish i could pee on this if i had the energy poop on couch. Spend six hours per day washing, but still have a crusty butthole hide when guests come over, and eat a rug and furry furry hairs everywhere oh no human coming lie on counter don't get off counter and cat jumps and falls onto the couch purrs and wakes up in a new dimension filled with kitty litter meow meow yummy there is a bunch of cats hanging around eating catnip meeeeouw hack.